Heavy Hearted

I'm depressed, and two things strike me as so supremely screwed up.

1. AshleyMadison.com exists. Every commercial they put out makes me want to weep.

2. My country as a majority doesn't think this is a baby or care enough to protect it.

I don't want to feel better. I don't want to brush it into the corner of my mind. I don't want to stop crying about the millions of ways people destroy their own lives or literally destroy the lives of innocents for whom they've been made responsible.

I long for revival, but I am not on my knees enough praying for it or on my feet enough fighting for it. God help us.

A Renewed Interest

...in all things Austen.

Due to the insane snowfall and with nothing else to do, my sister and I spent the last two days obsessively watching all four parts of the BBC's Emma. It aired several months ago in the UK and is now showing here, Sunday nights on PBS, but Lizzy and I -being the rather impatient creatures we are- watched the whole series (four hours!) in low-resolution via Youtube. Let me assure you,

It is amazing.

I've always been an avid Jane Austen fan--stereotypically so, given my status as a formerly-homeschooled female-- so of course I'm excited every time a new installment (in what has become almost a genre of its own) presents itself. With that said, though, there's something about this particular production that may appeal even to the regency-reluctant. The screenplay takes a few liberties with Jane's story that, instead of modernizing or detracting from the plot, actually help an audience that may have never read the book understand some of the complexities of Emma's world (social customs, womens' life in that time, etc. etc.)... all without sounding too trite or obvious for the hardcore Austenites.
In keeping with Austen's incredible understanding of human nature, every attempt is made to flesh-out and delineate characters who, in former renditions, never received more than a passing nod as a plot device or behavioural caricature. Miss Bates, for instance, is not simply written-off as a horrible prattler, but backed up with all of the insecurities and sadness that would explain her quirks; Mrs. Elton- often portrayed as a plain-looking, buzzing annoyance akin to the inconvenience of a housefly- is beautiful, arrogant, and almost devious in her snobbery and ill-will towards Emma; Mr. Knightley's brother confronts life with a largely cynical outlook and dry sense of humor, which combats the insatiable nervousness Isabella, Emma's sister, seems to have inherited from their father. Romola Garai gives the lead character an intense animation and zest for life that self-absorbed Gwyneth Paltrow could never have mustered, and though Johnny Lee Miller's Knightley is, admittedly, neither as dashing nor as humourous as the one I grew up watching, as Lizzy puts it "He grows on your like a wart," which is fitting for a leading-man who *isn't* the leading man until the end of the story.

Overall, I thoroughly recommend it and may even endeavor to make Eric watch it. I never force chick-flicks on him, but it's that good.

In all of Austen's work Emma has always been the character who I most relate to and who makes me most uncomfortable.
My family always accused me of being an Emma, with my annoying need to match-make and unfortunate knack for never being able to hold my tongue. She is probably the most vulnerable and awkward of Jane's leading ladies, unbalanced, with a desire to help people which is always hampered by her own snobbery or impulsiveness. There were multiple times while we watched this when I had to cover my face in shame while my sister looked at me with that "You have SO done that" expression. When I first watched the Gwyneth Paltrow version the comparison was almost flattering, as Emma took on a "practically perfect in every way" sort of persona, whereas this version --which is most true to the book-- just makes me squirm. That brings me to my question,

If you were a literary character (doesn't have to one of Jane Austen's,) who would you be?

Why not?

This particular survey is being tossed back and forth on Xanga like a beach-ball, and -unlike most surveys- it's pretty fun, so I thought I'd post it here and see if anyone in my small readership would like to give it a try (It's harder to answer some of the questions than you might think!)

If I were a month, I would be July.

If I were a day of the week, I would be Tuesday.

If I were a time of the day, I would be early evening.

If I were a planet, I would be Uranus, rolling around sideways-- the oddball.

If I were a sea animal, I would be a pink aenenome.

If I were a direction, I would be North-West.

If I were a piece of furniture, I would be a striped chaise longue with peeling brass finish on the legs.

If I were a liquid, I would be olive oil.

If I were a gemstone, I would be the purpley-green version of Topaz.

If I were a tree, I would be an apple tree: Not thin and stately like an Aspen, or old and wise like an Oak-- Unremarkable, but nice to have around.

If I were a tool, I would be a level.

If I were a flower, I would be a yellow Pansy wishing she was a splashy Tiger Lily.

If I were a kind of weather, I would be a freak snowstorm...easily flurried around, but quick to calm down and melt.

If I were a musical instrument, I'd be a harmonica.

If I were a color, I would be navy.

If I were an emotion, I would be argumentative.

If I were a fruit, I would be raspberries.

If I were a sound, I would be the click-clack-clunk sound of an old typewriter.

If I were an element, I would be Helium (He).

If I were a car, I would be a green Jaguar E-Type.

If I were a food, I would be a potato.

If I were a place, I would be an abandoned greenhouse.

If I were a material, I would be cotton.

If I were a taste, I would be a little salty.

If I were a scent, I would be basil.

If I were an animal, I would be a goose.

If I were an object, I would be a picture frame.

If I were a body part, I would be the thumbs.

If I were a facial expression, I would be intrigued.

If I were a pair of shoes, I would be low-top Chuck Taylor Converse.


And, on a side note, though it's not necessarily new (it's been out at least a year or so), I just discovered this cd:
..and I am completely in love. Partly because the "She" is Zooey Deschanel, who I think is utterly amazing, both for her roles (aside from 500 Days of Summer, which was a bit of a letdown) and her incredible sense of style:

Amazing, no?

Anyways, the whole album is perfect. She does a few 50s/60s covers, but all the songs have a very classic feel about them. Five stars.

Christmas!

'Twas Fun.

New Year's Eve

Happy 2010!

The Wait is Over, Sort of.

Hey all you unrequited lovers!

Tired of going about your normal "activities" without songs that truly speak to your yearning heart?
Never fear! Your crush may not care, but these songs go out to you:

Mallory's Songs to Stalk By!

Even on those tough days when restraining orders and broken binoculars have you feeling blue, these classic and contemporary hits will keep you right where you should be:
Hidden in the bushes under your beloved's window.

This collection makes a perfect gift for the stalker in your life, or --if you're the unappreciated one-- an excellent way to share your true feelings when you get so nervous your tongue swells up.

*disclaimer: Some of these favorites were written by obviously desperate individuals, so language/content may be seen as questionable, strange, or downright creepy. Enjoy!

What "love songs" do you find creepy?

Of Puppies, The Scene Aesthetic, Theology, and Celebrity Reincarnations

There's a lot to cover, so I'll just launch right into it.

Of Puppies:

We got one. His name is Banjo.
Poor Eric- his mom pointed out- has bags under his eyes from letting this little guy out at night. (I help, but somehow I sleep through the initial squealing, which ends up driving Eric nuts before it wakes me up. )
He--the puppy in question-- is incredibly potty-trainable, but I won't go into the details because I feel that most people won't find the specifics interesting.

Of The Scene Aesthetic:
(hint: They aren't here because I love them)

Basically, they're two guys who see nothing wrong with covering Taylor Swift's Love Story. The testosterone sure is flowing with these two.
I saw them in concert last month, opening for Owl City, and everyone in our group was trying to rip their ears off by the second song.
I've granted you all a boon by not posting one of their original songs, but misery loves company, so I had to say SOMETHING about them.

Of Theology:
In seriousness, now. I used to be pretty relaxed about how people in the Christian community chose to interpret God's role in their life. I figured that the question of whether we choose God or God chooses us was chicken-and-egg and not too much of an issue. It is. God is the ultimate Being, the Creator of the Universe. If I had to pick Him in order to give Him any power over my life, we are all screwed. He has pulled me back, chastened me, and refined me all these years against my human will. And there's a lot more that is truly important. If Jesus is the Way, and the Only WAY... I hesitate to think that God wants us to blur every other line, I have been painfully convicted on the following points, lately.

• You must fear God. Our Lord is not Barney the Dinosaur-- men were struck to the ground in the presence of angels, how much more so would we be humiliated by our sinfulness, our vanity, our humanity in the presence of God Himself? It is only fitting that we live in fear of His power, and be humbled by his grace. If one more girl insists that Jesus is her boyfriend, I may explode.
• God is God over every aspect of our lives, and if we resign His influence to church on Sunday, we do not know him.
  
• God is a political God. See above.
  
• Rebuke is not hatred; it is one of the most sincere forms of love. If we do not actively wish to help better our brothers/sisters in Christ, we do them a great disservice.
• We are not saved by works, but to refuse to do work is to not love Christ enough. We should not only do good works, but do them so cheerfully that people stop and wonder about us.
  
• There is no topic on which God is silent. Even the tiny things either tend towards vanity (which tends toward Satan) or towards humility, (which tends towards Christ).
• Back again to cheerfulness: Paul says in Philippians 4:11, "...for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content:" He was in prison! "Content" does not mean bearing hang-doggedly with whatever comes our way, in fact it probably requires us to be almost unaware of what might trouble us. What's more, we should do it smiling, because Christ has borne our sins! The average person (me especially) has no idea what it means to carry a cross, or to be locked in prison... and given that fact, we should be incredibly careful of treating day-to-day challenges as if they were crosses to bear--if we think that a bad day at work or drama with a friend counts as a cross, we're hugely underestimating Jesus' gift.

I have so much more I could rant on about, but I think I'll put it all in one post one of these days...

And, to point out how insane Hollywood is.
Celebrity Re-Incarnations:

I infinitely prefer the originals.

I've decided the New Hollywood formula is basically this:

1. Be symmetrical/beautiful (unless you're Adrian Brody)
2. Resemble someone else who made it big
   
3. Up your "now" factor by getting a few tattoos
   
4. Don't overthink. Don't think at all.

My Grandma tells me I look like Loretta Young (I don't see it, do you?), so I'm set... some agent just has to notice me.


Who's your Old Hollywood look-alike?